November 7, 2021

#25: SPUD

There are some circumstances and relationships we engage with knowing of the heartbreak lurking just around the corner. We let pets into our lives knowing full-well that we will outlive them; we have children knowing full-well they will outlive us; and while don’t think of it on a day-to-day basis, we will all (god-willing) outlive our parents. In each scenario, despair is inevitable, but we engage in them because the joy and love gained will always outweigh the pain of loss.

A loss of a sibling, however, doesn’t adhere to these rules. Siblings usually there from the beginning, even before conscious memories are captured. In sibling relationships, more time is spent thinking about growing old together than experiencing life without them by your side. Unlike parents and children, a sibling is on a parallel path, and the shock of losing one is immense.

Reader, I am fortunate enough to have never experienced this shock. However, a childhood friend of mine was not so lucky. A few years ago, her younger brother Kevin passed away, and she and her family had to experience all that comes with this kind of loss. While I didn’t know the man Kevin would grow up to be, I do remember him being one of the coolest kids on our block growing up (think Shawn Hunter).

On the anniversary of his passing, my friend reached out to both me and my younger brother to contribute to a collection of memories she was creating for her parents. I was at a loss for words, but my younger brother recalled a crucial developmental moment while playing a friendly game of Spud, a childhood game we use to play on our block. The following vignette brings life to my brother’s memory, and hopefully, captures a little bit of who Kevin was.

Thanks for reading.

“SPUD”

“Can you explain it to me one more time?” Kevin asked.

Rob sighed and threw his hands up in the air. “Again. Really? If you can’t remember the rules, you can’t play.”

Johnny bounced the kickball up and down and put his hand on Rob’s shoulder. “Relax, man! You barely could remember the rules a few years ago yourself.” Johnny, turning towards his little brother, held one finger in the air. “Alright, Kev. Listen up! One more time.”

Kevin, looking up towards his older brother, was all ears.

“One person throws the ball in the air and calls another person’s name.” Johnny threw the ball high in the air. “Then, the person whose name was called needs to run to the ball, grab it, and yell ‘SPUD’!”

Kevin squinted his whole face, “Why SPUD?”

Rob snickered again, “Man, you are such a little kid!”

Johnny stroked his chin. “You know. I’m not really sure. That’s how it was explained to me!” Johnny threw the ball up and caught it again. “Once SPUD is yelled, everyone needs to stop moving.”

Kevin nodded his head up and down. “Oh yes! I remember now. Then the person can only move four steps towards someone else.”

Johnny smiled, “Yes! And then…?”

“And then you hit them with the ball!” Kevin exclaimed!

Johnny beamed. “You’ve got it, bud!”

Rob, annoyed at the wasted time, hurried everyone along. “Great. What a Kodak moment. Can we play now?”

Kevin looked towards his neighbor and banged his fists together. “Let’s do this!”

Johnny took the ball and motioned for everyone to circle up. He glanced to his left and saw his sister Jess looking alert. Across from him was Rob and his older brother Craig. Rob, yawning, motioned for him to get on with it. To his right, stood Kevin. While smaller than the rest, Kevin had fire in his eyes.

Johnny smirked to himself, threw the ball and yelled, “Kevin!”

The ball sailed high into the air as everyone in the circle scattered. Kevin, shocked, paused for a brief movement before running towards Johnny’s now vacant position. The ball bounced twice on the ground before Kevin picked it up and yelled, “SPUD!”

Everyone stopped dead in their tracks.

Kevin surveyed the area. Johnny, the fastest of the bunch, was too far out of reach. He almost wished Johnny were a bit closer. There’s a good chance his older brother would have helped him out. The closest to him was his older sister, Jess. But Kevin said to himself, “I have bigger fish to fry.”

Turning around, Kevin’s eyes fell upon Rob, who was not too far away but not too close either. Kevin smirked and turned his whole body in Rob’s direction.

“Yeah, right! You’ll never be able to hit me, little kid!” Rob yelled from his position.

Kevin jumped farther than he’s ever jumped before. “S!”

He did it again. “P!”

“U!”

“D!

Kevin was within striking distance.

Rob’s whole posture changed. His brow furrowed, and he cracked all his knuckles.

Wiping his forehead, Kevin wiped brought the ball back with his right hand. As it passed his lips, he gave it a little kiss. With his arm outstretched, Kevin snapped forward and the ball flung forward. The ball sailed through the air, sinking as it went.

Direct hit! The ball landed right on Rob’s left leg and bounced off.

“Yes!” Kevin jumped in the air, landed, and conducted his own little end-zone dance.

The rest ran over smiling and hollering. Johnny, beaming, ran to his little brother, hugged him, and gave him a high five.

Johnny asked, “What do you think of Kev now, Rob?”

Rob patted down his pants and then picked up the ball. “I guess he’s not so little anymore.” He turned towards Kevin, “Good hit, Kev.”

“Let’s go again,” Kevin said.

All the players circled up again. This time, it was Rob’s turn to throw the ball in the air.

“Kevin!”

Everyone ran as far away from the ball as possible, except for Kevin. He ran straight towards it.